A recent conversation with a friend was my motivation to begin blogging again. This time I would like to be more consistent than twice a year, but I make no promises. Here goes...
We are several weeks into the new school year, so I'll stop to evaluate our progress.
Books and materials gathered - Check!
Lessons being completed - Check!
Kids learning - Check!
Schedule in place - Check! (this has been one of our biggest challenges)
I am pleased that we seem to have gained a sort of flow that didn't exist when we started. I'm also pleased with my own improvement as "administrator" of this little school-house we call home. We've come a long way over the last few years.
Yet I am baffled. While I can appreciate our growth and stability, I still struggle to meet the high expectations that reside somewhere in my head.
-We've accomplished so much, but I still feel inadequate.
-We are succeeding, but I feel like I'm failing.
-We've created a life-school, but wouldn't they be better off in "real" school?
Are you getting dizzy yet? I see a future for those interested in HPPS. That would be Homeschool Parent Psychological Services, for those who don't know. And I'm sure you don't, because I just made it up. :-)
As I write I'm reminded of what the Bible says about this kind of thinking.
"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does." James 1:5-8, NIV
Okay, so now what? I am clear of my calling to homeschool. I am also clear that God never asked me to do this alone. So I'm going back to the book of James. I'll focus on chapter 1 verse 5. That's enough for me.
"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him."